I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize