She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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