I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize