waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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