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Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
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