im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
