Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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