I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
