We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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