I need help removing her.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
