next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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