Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
