PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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