i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Randomize
