I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
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