oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
