I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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