Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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