i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Someone shit on the floor
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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