At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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