Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
