i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
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