what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
