I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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