I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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