Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
