Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I just made out with a guy for $7.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize