fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
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