Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
