I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
