im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
