she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
