He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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