the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
