People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
