My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
