and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
