Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
