This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
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