I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
