the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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