Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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