This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Congratulations! We have a period
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