Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Randomize
