please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize