i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
