NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
