I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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