PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
