Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
