I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Randomize
